Santiago Hash House Harriers Hymnal
These are the songs we typically sing. Don't feel limited, though. There are many hymnals on the web. Check them out and sing us your favorite song!
AMAZING BEER (Melody - Amazing Grace)
A - maz - ing beer,
A taste profound,
A whole keg just for thee!
The pack is lost,
But home you've found,
The beer check you can see
HE OUGHTA BE PUBLICLY PISSED ON
He oughta be publicly pissed on
He oughta be publicly shot (bang bang)
He oughta be tied to a urinal
And left there to fester and rot
LOVE ME TENDER (Melody - Love Me Tender)
Love me tender, love me sweet
Wrap your lips around my meat
Watch me smile and watch me grin
As the cum rolls down, down, down, down, down
MY VAGINA HURTS (Melody: Oh my darlin Clementine)
My vagina, my vagina, my vagina really hurts
I would rather have
A sore vagina
Than a face that
Looks like yours
Wings of an Eagle (melody: My Bonnie Lies over the Ocean)
If I had the wings of an eagle,
If I had the eyes of a crow,
I'd fly above all God's creations,
And shit on the hashers below.
Shit on, shit on,
Shit on the hashers below, below
Shit on, shit on,
Shit on the hashers below!
My One Skin Hangs Down (Melody: "My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean")
My one skin hangs down to my two skin
My two skin hangs down to my three
My three skin hangs down to my fore skin
My fore skin hangs down to my knees
Roll back, roll back
Roll back my foreskin for me, for me
Roll back, roll back
Roll back my foreskin for me
WHIP IT OUT AT THE BALL GAME (Melody: "Take Me Out to the Ball Game")
Whip it out at the ball game
Wave it round at the crowd
Dip it in peanuts and cracker jack
If you like you can give it a whack
'Cause it's beat your meat at the ball game
If you don't come it's a shame
For it's one, two, you've covered in goo
At the old ball game
HERE'S TO (Insert Hash Name)
Here's to (Insert Hash Name),
He's true blue, He's a Hasher,
Through and through,
He's a pisspot,
So they say,
Tried to go to heaven,
But he went the other way,
So drink it down, down, down . . .
SHITTY TRAIL
S-H-I-T-T-Y T-R-A-I-L
Shitty trail (It sucked!),
Shitty trail (It really sucked!),
THE HARES HAVE LAID ANOTHER SHITTY TRAIL!
I would rather stay here and drink my beer than run your shitty trail.
SHITTY HARE (To the Tune of Living on a Prayer)
Ohhh, there was no beer out there
Ohhh oh, you're a shitty hare
Take some flour, and use it on trail
Ohhh oh, you're a shitty hare
You're a shitty hare!
HEY HARES (Melody 'Hey Jude' by The Beatles)
Hey hares
Your trail was shit
You got the pack lost
Now go and find them
Remember to use flour and chalk
And your next trail
Will be much better better better better better better yeah
Down down down down down down, down down down, shitty hares
Soldier Song
Asshole, asshole, a soldier I will be
To piss, to piss, two pistols on my knee
For cunt, for cunt, for country and for queen
Asshole, asshole, asshole, asshole
A soldier I will be
Born Beautiful
Why were they born so beautiful?
Why were they born at all?
They're no bloody use to anyone,
They're no bloody use at all.
They may be a joy to their mothers,
but they're a pain in the ass to me.
Close to Brew (melody: Close to You)
Why do hashers suddenly appear,
Every time beer is near?
Just like me, they long to be,
Close to Brew,
Ahhhhh Ahhhh Ahh,
Close to Brew,
Ahhhhh Ahhhh Ahh,
Ese Farol
Ese farol no alumbra, no alumbra ese farol
Ese farol no alumbra, no alumbra ese farol
Póngale parafina, que alumbrará mejor
¡Y!; Póngale póngale, póngale, póngale, póngale. (póngale = drink it down)
It's a Small Dick
Well it isn't long and it isn't thick,
It gets hard too slow and it cums too quick,
It gets lost in her twat,
But it's all that he's got,
It's a small, small, dick.
It's a small dick after all,
It's a small dick after all,
Always limp from alcohol,
It's a small, small, dick!
All Right
They're all right
They're all right
They're a little flat chested
But they're all right.
I like you so much better when you're naked - Ida Maria
I like you so much better when you're naked
I like me so much better when you're naked
But I wont mi-i-i-i-i-i-i-ind
If you take off all your clothes
Come on, take 'em off
The Hairs of Her Dickie-Dido
Chorus: And the hairs, and the hairs,
And the hairs of her dickie-dido hung down to her knees.
Verses:
One white one, one black one, and one with a bit of shite on
and one with a little light on to show us the way.
She married an Italian with balls like a bloody stallion
as the hairs of her dickie-dido hung down to her knees.
It'd take a brontosaurus to eat her clitoris
as the hairs of her dickie-dido hung down to her knees.
It'd take a Welsh miner to find her vagina
as the hairs of her dickie-dido hung down to her knees.
It'd take a bloody wrecker to extract your pecker
as the hairs of her dickie-dido hung down to her knees.
YOGI BEAR SONG (Melody - Camptown Races)
There is a bear in the deep dark woods,
Yogi, Yogi,
There is a bear in the deep dark woods,
Yogi, Yogi Bear.
CHORUS (REPEAT PREVIOUS VERSE):
Yogi, Yogi Bear!
Yogi, Yogi Bear!
There is a bear in the deep dark woods,
Yogi, Yogi Bear.
VERSES
Yogi has a little friend, Boo-Boo, Boo-Boo
Yogi has a girlfriend, Cyndi, Cyndi
Cyndi has a shaven snatch, Grizzly, Grizzly
Cyndi wears crotchless undies, Teddy, Teddy
Cyndi likes it on the ice, Polar, Polar
Cyndi gets what she deserves, Pregnant, Pregnant
Cyndi likes it up the rear, Dirty, Dirty
Cyndi's tampon has no string, Cotton, Cotton
Yogi didn't use a condom, Daddy, Daddy
Boo-Boo likes it upside down, Koala, Koala
Boo-Boo has a twelve-inch cock, Cindy's a lucky bear
Boo-Boo's only three feet tall, Yogi's a lucky bear
Boo-Boo likes it up the butt, Yogi's a lucky bear
Yogi's girlfriend has no teeth, Gummi, Gummi
Yogi didn't wipe his butt, Brown, Brown
Yogi's in the NRA, Right to, Right to
Yogi uses Afro-Sheen, Black, Black
Yogi got a case of crabs, Itchy, Itchy
Boo-Boo likes to stroke his tool, Wanker, Wanker
Yogi also likes young boys, Poofter, Poofter
This song has gone on way too long, More than, More than (I can bear)
Prayer
Our Lager
Which art in barrels,
Hallowed be thy drink.
Thy will be drunk,
I will be drunk,
At home as in the tavern.
Give us this day our foamy head,
And forgive us our spillages,
As we forgive those who spill against us.
And lead us not into incarceration,
But deliver us from hangovers
For thyne is the beer
The bitter and lager
Forver and ever
Barmen
Head
Head?!?
Who said head?
I'll have some of that.
And we did.
And it was good!
And there was much rejoicing!
And then we fucked!
We fucked for hours,
Uprooting trees and shrubs and flowers,
Like Vikings, with horns on our head!
Head?!?
Who said head?
Hash Hymn
Swing low, sweet chariot
Coming for to carry me home,
Swing low, sweet chariot,
Coming for to carry me home.
I looked over Jordan, and what did I see
Coming for to carry me home?
A band of angels coming after me,
Coming for to carry me home.
Hymn Gestures
Swing low - Hands clasps into lap rocking motion with the arms
Sweet - Kiss fingers and blow off kiss
Chariot - Simulate riding a chariot with invisible reins
Comin' - Simulated (male) masturbation
For - Hold up four (4) fingers
To - Hold up two (2) fingers
Carry me - Cradle arms (as if carrying a baby)
Home - Form a roof over your head with your arms
I - Point at yourself
Looked - Shade eyes with hand
Over - (keeping hand in place) look around
Jordan - Option 1: sea/wave gesture with hand
Option 2: Simulate having over large breasts with two hands
And what - Look inquisitive
Did I see - Point at your eye
A band - Play air trombone
Of angels - Flap arms like wings
